Jokes |
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A man took his dog to the vets and asked the vet t...
A man was very proud of his guard
dog, he would ...
A man is
walking down the street when he hears
...
A man and his dog went into a pub. The barman said...
Upon
entering the little country store, the
st...
A man walked by a table in a hotel and noticed
...
A man took his Rottweiler to the
vet and said
...
A local business was
looking for office help.
...
Paul got off
the elevator on the 40th floor
an...
Q: When's the best time to take your doberman
pi...
Q: Why do dogs bury bones in the ground? - A:
...
Q: How did bulldogs get such flat
noses? - A:
...
Q: What has got four legs and an arm?
- A: A
R...
Q: How do you get a dog to stop
barking in the
...
Q:
What do you say to a dog before he eats? -
...
Q: Why did the dog cross the road? - A: Because it...
Q: Why is a dog's nose in the middle of
it's
f...
Q: When is a strange dog
most likely to go
int...
Q: What
happened when the dog went to the flea
...
Q: Why did the lazy person buy a tall dog? - A: So...
Q: What kind of dog does a dracula like? - A: A
...
Q: What did the puppy say when he sat on sand
pa...
Q: What goes "krab, krab, krab"? - A: A dog
bark...
Q: What side of the dog has the most fur? - A: The...
Q:
Why does a dog wag it's tail? - A: No one
e...
Two Scottish nuns have just arrived in the USA by ...
Small girl: I'd buy that dog, but
his legs
are...
Where did the dog breeder keep his savings ? In
...
What dogs are best for sending telegrams ?
Wire
...
What do you call a happy Lassie ?
A jolly
colli...
What do you call a nutty dog in Australia ?
A
d...
What kind of dog sniffs out new flowers ?
A bud
...
Why didn't the dog speak to his foot ?
Because
...
What is the dogs
favourite city ?
New
Yorkie ...
Who is the dogs favourite comedian ?
Growlcho
M...
What did the cowboy say when the bear ate
Lassie...
What do you get if you take a really big dog out
...
What kind of meat do you give a stupid dog
?
Ch...
What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear ?
A
pe...
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a
r...
Why did the poor dog chase his own tail ?
He
wa...
What did the angry man sing
when he found his
...
Why do dogs wag their
tails ?
"Because no
one...
What happened to the
dog that ate nothing but
...
Why do dogs bury bones in
the ground
?
Becaus...
What happened when the dog went to the flea circus...
What do you get if you cross a dog with Concorde
...
Why did the dog wear white sneakers ?
Because
h...
What do you get if you cross
a giraffe with a
...
Where do Eskimos train
their dogs ?
In the
mu...
What is the difference between Father Christmas
...
When is the
most likely time that a stray dog
...
What do you get if you cross a dog and a
cheet...
What kind of dog sounds
like you can eat it
?
...
What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a
...
What do you get if you cross a Rottweiller and a
...
What do dogs have that
no other animal has
?
...
What do you call an alcoholic dog ?
A whino
!...
What is a dog's favourite sport ?
Formula 1
dro...
What is a dog's favourite food ?
Anything that
...
What dog wears contact lenses ?
A cock-eyed
spa...
What is a dogs favourite flower ?
Anything in
y...
What's a dog favourite hobby ?
Collecting
fleas...
How many seasons are there in a dogs life
?
Jus...
Why is it called a "litter" of
puppies
?
Beca...
How do you stop a dog smelling ?
Put a peg on
i...
When does a dog go "moo" ?
When it is learning
...
What kind of dog chases anything
red ?
A
bull...
What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals ?
A
...
What do you call a dog in jeans and a sweater
?
...
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a
...
Why do you need a licence for a dog and not for
...
What do you call a dog in the middle of a muddy
...
When is a black dog not a black dog ?
When
it's...
What do you get if you cross a dog with a
blin...
What do you get if you cross a Beatle and an
A...
What happens to a dog that keeps eating bits off
...
What do you get if you cross a
computer and a
...
What do you get if you cross a dog
with a
kang...
What do you get if you
cross a dog and a sheep
...
What do you get if cross two young dogs with a
p...
What do you get if you cross a dog with a frog
?...
What do you
call a litter of young dogs who
ha...
What do you call a dog with no legs ?
It
doesn'...
How do
you feel if you cross a sheepdog with a
...
What do you call a black Eskimo dog ?
A dusky
h...
What do you call a sheepdog's tail that can tell
...
Why did the dog have a gleam in his
eye?
Someon...
Why do dogs
run in circles ?
Because its
hard...
How do you find your dog if
he's lost in the
w...
How can you tell a dog from a tomato?
The
tomat...
How can you tell a dog from an elephant?
The
el...
How did the dog feel when he lost his
flashlig...
How did the dog get into the locked cemetery at
...
How did the dog make anti-freeze?
He stole her
...
How did the dog make gold soup?
He put in 24
ca...
How did the dog's owner know his pet was angry
...
How do you keep a dog from barking in your
fro...
What did the dog do when the panhandler
put
th...
What did the dog do with the history
professor?
...
What did the dog get when he multiplied 497 by
6...
What did the dog say to the pig?
You are just a
...
What did the dog say when he chased his
tail?
T...
What did the dog take when he was run down?
The
...
What did the dog use to
make his
kite?
Flypap...
What happened to the dog that fell into a
lens...
What happened when the shaggy dog
swallowed a
...
What has 2,000 eyes and 4,000 feet?
A thousand
...
What is a baseball dog?
One that chases
fowls....
What is a dog who crosses the street twice in
...
What is black and white and red all over?
A
Dal...
What is taller when it sits down than
when it
...
What is the difference between a barking dog and
...
What is the difference between a dog and
a
mai...
What is worse than a
dog howling at the
moon?
...
What looks like a dog, sounds like a dog, eats
l...
What place of business helps dogs who have lost
...
What should you do if you find an angry 500-pound ...
What should you do if you see a vicious
dog?
Ho...
What should you know before you teach your
dog
...
What was the dog doing on the turnpike?
About
s...
What would you call a nine day old dog in
Russ...
What would you get if you crossed a chicken with a...
When is a dog most impolite?
When he points....
When you catch your dog eating a dictionary, what ...
Where do you usually find dogs?
It all depends
...
Which dog can tell time?
A watchdog....
Which dog eats with its tail?
All dogs keep
the...
Which dog is always without
a tail?
A hot
dog...
Which dog looks like a cat?
A police dog in
dis...
Which dog tastes better when eaten?
A hot
dog....
Why did the dog go to the doctor after a tomato
...
Why did the dog mistake the dog catcher for
a
...
Why did the dog run in circles?
He was a
watchd...
Why did the dog say he was an
actor?
His
leg ...
Why did the dog sleep so poorly?
By mistake he
...
Why did the dog's owner think his dog
was a
gr...
Why did the thoughtful father buy his six children...
Why didn't the dog play
cards on his ocean
cru...
Why do dogs turn around three
times before
lyi...
Why does a d dog scratch himself?
He is the
onl...
Why doesn't a dog
ever have a nose 12 inches
l...
Why is a dog like a baseball player?
He runs
fo...
Why is a dog so
warm in Summer?
He wears a
co...
Why was the mother flea so unhappy?
All her
chi...
Would you rather have a 300-pound dog chase you or...
Why is a dog with a lame leg
like adding 6 and
...
My dog is great at math.
Really ?
Ask him
ho...
A man and his son were
shovelling the driveway
...
Four workers
were discussing how smart their
d...
The front door
was accidentally left open and
...
What dog
is a cousin to the Dalmatian?
A
spo...
Dad, I spotted a Dalmatian!
No need to, it
alr...
What do you call a boring
dog?
A
dull-mation...
What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a
...
What kind of dog is a person's best friend?
A
...
Why is it hard for Chihuahuas to type on a
keybo...
How are you going to pay the Chihuahua who helped ...
What kind of computers do chihuahuas like
best?
...
What does a Chihuahua play basketball with?
A
t...
Alsation: Was your master playing catch with you? ...
What is a Chihuahua's
favorite sport?
Miniat...
What kind of leash should you buy for a Chihuahua?...
A Chihuahua was shopping in a mall when another
...
Why should you never watch a video with a
Chih...
What is brown
and gray, has eight legs, and is
...
Alsation: What is your
favorite holiday?
Chi...
Alsation: Why do you like to go on camping
tri...
I just spotted a Chihuahua!
That wasn't very
n...
Why are Chihuahuas such good bedtime storytellers?...
Alsation: I'll see you shortly.
Chihuahua:
Oka...
Alsation: How come
you are always so well
beha...
How did the Chihuahua disappear
on the road?
...
Why do Chihuahuas have such short
necks?
Bec...
What did the elephant say when it saw the
Chih...
Why can't Chihuahuas run marathons?
They're
sh...
What is black and white and red all over?
A
Ch...
What kind
of pants do you buy for your pet
Chi...
What do you do when a Chihuahua sneezes?
Get a
...
Where do you take a Chihuahua that has fallen into...
What is the best kind of dog to ask for
direct...
What artistic dog
chews a lot and follows the
...
What do you call a black Eskimo dog ?
A dusky
h...
What is the only breed of dog a boxer is afraid
...
What has eighteen legs and fetches a ball?
The
...
What kind of dog can you best see in the
dark?
...
What is a collie puppy's favorite toy?
A
chew-...
What dogs are best for sending telegrams ?
Wire
...
What kind of dog sniffs out new flowers ?
A bud
...
What dog is always tired in London?
An English
...
What kind of dog is the most colorful?
A paint
...
What wears a black, white, and tan coat but has no...
What kind of dog always needs a shave?
A
beard...
What kind of dog can tell time?
A
clockshund!...
What dog wears a white coat and does science
e...
What do you get when you cross a sled dog with an ...
Every time I tell my English Setter to stop
bark...
What kind of dog doesn't do well in hot weather?
...
What is the best kind of dog to direct traffic at ...
What do you get when you cross a collie with a
...
What dog do other dogs go to when they
are
sic...
How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a...
What dog would you want on your American football ...
What kind of dog is the smartest?
A great
brai...
What dog wears contact lenses ?
A cock-eyed
spa...
What dog do other dogs tell their problems to?
...
What dog takes the money and runs fast!
A
payh...
What dog always gets on everyone's nerves?
A
g...
When are Pomeranians good at taking photographs?
...
What dogs never get lost?
Newfound-lands!...
How can you make a basset hound fast?
Take
awa...
What dog sweats the most and drinks the most
w...
What should you do if you have a basset hound over...
If a beagle can't play a bugle in the marching
...
Which dog eats with its tail?
All dogs keep
the...
How do you make a dog
float?
Take two
scoops ...
What is your dog's favorite breakfast?
Pooched...
Where will a springer spaniel never shop?
At a
...
Alsation: How did you find the fleas?
Beagle:
...
What do you call an alcoholic dog ?
A whino
!...
How did the dog make anti-freeze?
He stole her
...
How many hairs are in a dog's tail?
None. They
...
Why is a dog like a baseball
player?
He
runs ...
Why didn't the dog
speak to his foot
?
Becaus...
When does a dog go "moo" ?
When it is learning
...
What did the dog use to make his
kite?
Flypap...
What kind of modeling clay does a dog use?
Fi-...
What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear ?
A
pe...
How did the dog's owner know his pet was angry
a...
When George Washington was a general, why did he
...
How can if
you have a stupid dog ?
It
chases ...
What is the difference between Father
Christma...
What is the
best way to follow a lost dog's
pa...
What dog rides a horse named Macaroni?
Yankee
...
What would you get if you crossed a chicken with a...
What do you get when you cross a
Doberman with
...
Why did the dog jump into the sea?
He wanted to
...
Why does the Hound of the
Baskervilles turn
ro...
What do you
get if you cross a labrador and a
...
Advertisement: Dog for sale. Really gentle. Eats
...
Two women, who are dog owners,
are arguing
whi...
Q: What's got four legs and no ears?
A: Mike
Ty...
Q.Why is a dog scared of a fire?
A.It doesn't
w...
What game do 18 dogs like to
play during the
s...
Why did the 3-legged dog go back to Dodge City?
...
Q. What did the dog say when he sat on
sand
pa...
A hound dog and a dalmation were sitting in an
...
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